This message is to some of my family members, friends and many people who visit my blogs and website. A lot of people are expressing that they are feeling fearful, some anxiety, anger and even frustration over the economy and other things that are happening on the world stage. All of these emotions are valid. However, these are the very emotions that will take us in the direction that we do NOT want to go in. After we acknowledge these feelings, it is important that we focus away from them.

How do we do that? Well, easier said than done. However, we must focus away from these negative emotions. There are two things that I know that will help us to do this.

1) Disassociate from mainstream media. No, I’m not asking you to throw your TV, radio or newspaper away. (Not yet, anyway.) However, I am asking you to take a break from them. I know some of us want to keep listening because we don’t want to miss any good news. But, what we need to understand is that the ‘good news’ is not going to come from mainstream media. The good news is about us and will come from us.

So, 2) Now is the time to focused on yourself. Now is the time to get out all those Anthony Robbins books and tapes that you promised you would listen to but never did. Find those Deepak Chopra books and tapes or Wayne Dyer or Ilyana Vanzant or any book tape, movie — or anybody that makes you feel good — that talks to you about the power within you. Find material that empowers you. That is what we need to focus on. Now is the time to get quiet, go within and start to understand who we really are and what we are capable of.

Once we start understanding our own innate power and start tapping into our innate wisdom and realized that there is so-o-o much more to us than we have been led to believe; then we will start to see ourselves and the world in a different perspective. Once we start seeing ourselves and the world in a different perspective — from a more empowered position, we will start to see the answers to many of the things that we consider challenges. And, some of the things that we consider challenges will no longer look like challenges to us.

Excerpts from the Epilogue of the book, “You Don’t Know Crazy”: My Aunt Thelma, my mother’s sister, is 95 years young. She was diagnosed with colon cancer about five years ago. She refused to have surgery and all other invasive medical treatment. According to all of her medical documentation, she should have died a few years ago. However, she still lives alone in the senior citizen complex, flirts with the roadside vegetable sellers, can walk faster than I can, and is teaching me an invaluable lesson about living and dying on your own terms. *****

Aunt Thelma passed over on May 4th, 2009. In her final days, she was happy and at peace with the decisions she’d made concerning her health and last days of this incarnation. She also said she was happy to have lived to see a black man be President of the United States. *****

Some other excerpts from the book that mention Aunt Thelma: One of my most special memories was watching Grandma Beady, Aunt Thelma and my mother getting dressed for church. They were dignified, strong, beautiful, stubborn, and incredibly stylish. They made their own clothes, styled their own hair and wore red lipstick. To this day, I buy and wear only red lipstick. To me lipstick is not lipstick if it’s not red. *****

I would usually choose a ric rac—the paddle with the ball attached by a long elastic or a set of ball and jacks. A slick linoleum covered the long hallway that literally went straight from the front door to the back door of the house. The linoleum was great for throwing and picking up jacks because it was so smooth. We’d also get a shopping trip to a fabric store. Roberta and I would get to pick out a few pieces of fabric to take home for my Aunt Thelma to make us shorts and play clothes for the summer, or dresses for the coming school year or church.

At times hilariously funny and always relentlessly honest,You Don’t Know Crazy presents an intelligent, informative portrayal of bipolar mood disorder and its effects on Bahati’s self-esteem, career, relationships and day-to-day coping.

Wambui also reveals exactly what she did that allowed her to reclaim her life, and she encourages the reader to understand that each and every one of us has an innate wisdom and strength that may have either been forgotten about, or the knowledge has been lost as to how to tap into that inner wisdom and strength. This book will show you how to find that within yourself, and reclaim your own life.

* She went from Broadway star to welfare mom. * Some said she was dead. * She was homeless. * Others said she was on drugs. * She was told she would spend her life in and out of mental institutions. * She was told her children could no longer live with her.

When it seemed like her life couldn’t get any worse, she decided she only had two options - she could either live, or she could die. If she lived, she told herself it would be on her own terms.

For the past 10 years she has researched, studied and explored various ‘quality of life’ altering strategies. Her mission was to find out how to have a life of joy, peace and fabulous health – the best life possible! This inspiring woman not only ‘got up’ when everyone thought she was ‘out for the count’, but rose to new heights, and continues to soar. You Don’t Know Crazy gives you the inspiration and tools that will allow you to soar too!

However, sleep is powerful and will surprise us when we think we have it under control. An example of this is when we fall asleep during our child’s dance or piano recital or a movie we were excited about seeing. And, of course, the results are tragic when people fall asleep while driving and cause fatal accidents. Don’t try to fight sleep. Sleep will win every time.

Don’t try to cheat sleep with barrels of coffee or toxic stimulants. Sometimes we may get temporary results from various artificial stimulants. However, to make this a regular practice, we are only cheating ourselves out of the joy of feeling good and being naturally healthy.

Sleep deprivation is serious. Interrogators and law enforcers use sleep deprivation as a means of bringing people to the ‘breaking point’ – where they finally confess and give information with little resistance. A person who has gone long periods without sleep cannot organize their thoughts and is not capable of mentally defending himself. In some countries, sleep deprivation has been used as a form of punishment on war prisoners. So, why do we do this to ourselves? A person is easier to control and brainwash when they have not had sleep for a long while.

Sleep is our body’s opportunity to recuperate from the stress and wear and tear of the day. Sleep is a natural healer. For the many, who may not take the time to meditate each day, this is the body’s opportunity to stop, be still and reconnect to the God source.

Yes, sometimes the unexpected happens and we find ourselves in situations where we are unable to get a sufficient amount of sleep. However, we should not make staying awake for extended periods of time the norm. We may need to organize our lives a little better to insure that we get to bed at a decent hour. (I know, easier said than done.) Or, perhaps, we just need to remember that sleep is important to our health and general wellbeing.

Do not take sleep for granted. A sufficient amount of sleep will help us stay healthy, energetic and beautiful inside and out –and it’s absolutely free. Good night!

Boy! I was wrong on both counts! As I prepare to celebrate my 59th birthday in a few days I realize thirty was not old. I also remember that when I was thirty I didn’t know everything about everything.

How old do you have to be to be officially old? Is it forty-nine, fifty-nine or one hundred fifty-nine. I don’t feel old. How is old supposed to feel, anyway? I’ve heard that “age ain’t nothing but a number”. I suppose it’s all about how we perceive ourselves and whether or not we choose to be old or not.

I’ve heard others say, “A woman should never reveal her age”. And, I’m aware of the age bias that most certainly exists in our society. However, I’m proud to have made it to 59. Many of my friends and loved ones did not make it to this day in 2009.

I love to repeat what I heard late comedian Richard Pryor say on one occasion. He said, “You don’t get to be old being no fool”. I take that to mean that with all the bad decisions and challenges I’ve dealt with over the years, I, somehow, must have been doing something right. I’m still here. And, if you are reading these words, you have been doing something right too. What if we replace the word old with the word wise? For instance — I am going to be 59 years

wise

. I like how that sounds.

So as we go forward into the wonderful year 2009, let’s start off by celebrating ourselves and all the things that we do right – celebrate everything that is right. Let’s celebrate our wisdom – our ‘wiseness’.

Go on now and have yourself a beautiful, happy, prosperous and glamorous new year. Yes, you, me, us –yes, we can do this. Look at how far we’ve already come. How many hurdles we’ve already jumped over and how many miracles we’ve already witnessed. Yeah, “age ain’t nothin’ but a number.” If I were to describe myself as a fine wine, I’d say that I’m still improving with age — distinctive, lively, darker colored — and a little ‘nutty’.

Many people think of change as something scary. In most cases the thing we fear most about change is the fear we build up by thinking about the worse case scenario “What if I fail?” “What will others say?” “It’s going to be too hard”. Change means to transform or modify something and that sounds like it could be a lot of work. Sometimes change does involve a lot of work. Hopefully, it will be pleasant work and work that was well worth the effort.

Here are five steps to help make your lifestyle changes easier:

1. Decide what you want to change.

2. Decide why you want to change. If you don’t have a strong reason to make the change, you are probably not going to change because you have no incentive to do so.

In this case, here is an exercise that you might find helpful. Write on a sheet of paper the changes you would like to make. Then, write the pros and cons for each change. See if your pros list (good reasons for making the changes) really outweighs the con list. If it does, change for you is going to be easy.

However, if you cannot think of good reasons and benefits for the change, you are probably in for a struggle. Take a good look at the situation. It may be that you are saying you want to make changes because you think you should. Perhaps the people around you have suggested changes you should make and you’re trying to please them. Maybe others are suggesting you make changes because for you to do so would benefit them. So, look at the situation with clarity.

3. Ask yourself, “What am I getting out of not changing?” For instance I have met people who could probably improve their health with little effort. However, to get too healthy would mean they would have to give up social security benefits and look for another source of income. Are you receiving a benefit, either physically or emotionally, that you would have to give up if you changed?

4. Once you have made up your mind to change and you know why you want to change, start immediately. Do not procrastinate (especially if procrastination is the habit you want to change). You do not have to announce anything to anyone. Just get the information you may need and start on your journey.

5. Find or write affirmations about what your desired results are. When you say affirmations, it’s like being your own cheerleader. If you have difficulty making statements that don’t feel true at first, the use the word “choose”. Say, “I ‘choose’ to loose 30 pounds”. Or, “I ‘choose’ to be my own boss”. “I ‘choose’ to find a way to make at least $10,000 each and every month”. Saying it this way makes your affirmations more believable for you and your subconscious.

And, remember, the universe or subconscious mind does not have a sense of humor. So don’t joke about not succeeding. Our psyche does not know the difference between what is real or imagined. Lifestyle changes can be fun and easy. I once heard someone say, “If you think change is difficult, try not changing”.

Also, you may find my article - 10 Tips For Relieving Depression helpful.

A few years ago my daughters invited me to go see a movie with them that I wasn’t sure I wanted to see. But, I went with them and I am so happy that I did because I thoroughly enjoyed it. It was such fun! The name of the movie was Napoleon Dynamite. Now this post or podcast is not about Napoleon Dynamite. I’m not going to talk about the movie. I’m not going to review it. I’m not going to talk about whether you saw it or didn’t see it.

The reason I’m mentioning the movie is because when I woke up this morning and my eyes popped open, I was looking at my ceiling when the thought came to me, “What are you going to do today Wambui?” And I instantly thought “Whatever I feel like I want to do, Gosh!”

And then I started laughing to myself because those are the first lines in the movie Napoleon Dynamite. The movie opens with Napoleon waiting for a school bus. Once he’s on the bus, his young friend turns to him and asks, “What are you going to do today Napoleon? And Napoleon says, “Whatever I feel like I wanna. Gosh!”

I laughed and I thought to myself, what a powerful statement - “Whatever I feel like I want to do”. And then, I thought to myself isn’t that why we do all of the things that we do in this life - so that we can eventually get to that place where we say, “I’m doing whatever I feel like I want to do”.

Isn’t that why so many of us dream of winning the lottery - and many of us dream of retiring – getting to that day when we don’t have the boss standing behind our back - and we can say, “I’m doing whatever I feel like I want to do.”

Hopefully, feeling like doing what ever you want to do – hopefully, you’d feel like you want to take care of your family. Hopefully, you’d feel like you want to take care of your children. Hopefully, you’d feel like you’d want to respect the rights of others. Hopefully, you’d feel like you want to stay out of jail. Hopefully, you’d feel like you want to respect the laws the best you can. That’s a powerful statement and I think a wonderful way to live.

And even though we have some commitments or things that we may not be thrilled about doing, or we may be feeling, oh I have to do this. I think it’s important to consciously try to more and more in a direction where you can say, “I’m doing this because I want to do it. I know for myself, and I know for a lot of other people too, we sometimes have problems saying “no”.

We take on commitments and we agree to things that we don’t really want to do. But then, of course, we have to do these things because we said we would. So, we find ourselves in these positions and even sometime in relationships that are not good for us. Then, we find ourselves going through the motions, but we’re doing things that we really don’t want to do.

It’s really important to take back control of our lives and do what we can to get closer and closer to that place where we can honestly say, “I’m doing whatever I want to do. The things that I’m doing in my life are things that I really want to do. These are the things that make me feel good.”

So, I’m going to leave you with that. Think about that. Ponder on that. Think about getting to that place – being in that place – or, acting as if you are already in that place — the place where, if someone were to ask you, “What are you going to do?” You can honestly say, “Whatever I feel like I want to do. Gosh!”

On purpose, take time to spend time with yourself –to reflect on and about yourself. Don’t let this whole day be about celebrating the independence of the country without also taking time to celebrate the independence and the freedom and the glory of who you are as well.

Celebrate the fact that you are still here because there are so many who did not make it through the year to be here today to celebrate this July 4, 2008. Celebrate the fact that you were given freedom of choice. Celebrate the fact that you have freedoms that no man or man-made laws can ever touch or take away from you. Celebrate the power of your mind. Celebrate the strength of your God given body and it’s ability to heal itself. Celebrate your ability to love. Celebrate your loved ones.

Ladies and gentlemen, this evening, should you happen to be out where they’re doing fireworks and you look up and you see the great display of lights in the sky; I want you to - on purpose - choose one magnificent display of color and lights and claim that as yours. You don’t have to tell anybody around you. You don’t have to make a big deal about this. But deep inside – in your mind - in your soul and in your heart just say to yourself, “That one is for me. That one is for wonderful, fabulous, magnificent me.”

If you think that divorcing someone else is stressful, painful and financially devastating, try divorcing yourself. Ouch! Not pretty. You cannot leave yourself. Therefore, learn to LOVE YOUR WONDERFUL, POWERFUL, MAGNIFICENT SELF!

When we stop worrying and feeling fearful, we open ourselves up to spiritual solutions. If we focus on celebrating our victory, answers and information that we need to get through the fire to the victory will appear seemingly out of nowhere. This technique is easier said than done. Our old habits die hard.

However, I invite you to try it. No matter what you are going through, see yourself already on the other side of it. See past the fire. Feel the celebration!

However, as I continued to listen, I realized they were not just talking about honoring the (so-called) dead. They were also talking about honoring those among us who are still very much alive.  “Honoring those who are not present” means to give reverence to people who may not be in the same room with us. What do we say or think about others when they can not hear us?